All's Well That Ends Well/Act 5

SCENE 1. Marseilles. A street.
[Enter HELENA, Widow, and DIANA, with two Attendants.]

HELENA.
 * But this exceeding posting day and night
 * Must wear your spirits low: we cannot help it.
 * But since you have made the days and nights as one,
 * To wear your gentle limbs in my affairs,
 * Be bold you do so grow in my requital
 * As nothing can unroot you. In happy time;—

[Enter a GENTLEMAN.]


 * This man may help me to his majesty's ear,
 * If he would spend his power.—God save you, sir.

GENTLEMAN.
 * And you.

HELENA.
 * Sir, I have seen you in the court of France.

GENTLEMAN.
 * I have been sometimes there.

HELENA.
 * I do presume, sir, that you are not fallen
 * From the report that goes upon your goodness;
 * And therefore, goaded with most sharp occasions,
 * Which lay nice manners by, I put you to
 * The use of your own virtues, for the which
 * I shall continue thankful.

GENTLEMAN.
 * What's your will?

HELENA.
 * That it will please you
 * To give this poor petition to the king;
 * And aid me with that store of power you have
 * To come into his presence.

GENTLEMAN.
 * The king's not here.

HELENA.
 * Not here, sir?

GENTLEMAN.
 * Not indeed.
 * He hence remov'd last night, and with more haste
 * Than is his use.

WIDOW.
 * Lord, how we lose our pains!

HELENA.
 * All's well that ends well yet,
 * Though time seem so adverse and means unfit.
 * I do beseech you, whither is he gone?

GENTLEMAN.
 * Marry, as I take it, to Rousillon;
 * Whither I am going.

HELENA.
 * I do beseech you, sir,
 * Since you are like to see the king before me,
 * Commend the paper to his gracious hand;
 * Which I presume shall render you no blame,
 * But rather make you thank your pains for it:
 * I will come after you with what good speed
 * Our means will make us means.

GENTLEMAN.
 * This I'll do for you.

HELENA.
 * And you shall find yourself to be well thank'd,
 * Whate'er falls more.—We must to horse again;—
 * Go, go, provide.

[Exeunt.]

SCENE 2. Rousillon. The inner court of the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Enter CLOWN and PAROLLES.]

PAROLLES.
 * Good Monsieur Lavache, give my Lord Lafeu this letter: I have
 * ere now, sir, been better known to you, when I have held
 * familiarity with fresher clothes; but I am now, sir, muddied in
 * fortune's mood, and smell somewhat strong of her strong
 * displeasure.

CLOWN.
 * Truly, Fortune's displeasure is but sluttish, if it smell
 * so strongly as thou speak'st of: I will henceforth eat no fish
 * of fortune's buttering. Pr'ythee, allow the wind.

PAROLLES.
 * Nay, you need not to stop your nose, sir; I spake but by a
 * metaphor.

CLOWN.
 * Indeed, sir, if your metaphor stink, I will stop my nose; or
 * against any man's metaphor. Pr'ythee, get thee further.

PAROLLES.
 * Pray you, sir, deliver me this paper.

CLOWN.
 * Foh, pr'ythee stand away. A paper from Fortune's close-stool
 * to give to a nobleman! Look here he comes himself.

[Enter LAFEU.]


 * Here is a pur of fortune's, sir, or of fortune's cat (but not
 * a musk-cat), that has fallen into the unclean fishpond of her
 * displeasure, and, as he says, is muddied withal: pray you, sir,
 * use the carp as you may; for he looks like a poor, decayed,
 * ingenious, foolish, rascally knave. I do pity his distress
 * in my similes of comfort, and leave him to your lordship.

[Exit.]

PAROLLES.
 * My lord, I am a man whom fortune hath cruelly scratched.

LAFEU.
 * And what would you have me to do? 'tis too late to pare her
 * nails now. Wherein have you played the knave with fortune, that
 * she should scratch you, who of herself is a good lady, and would
 * not have knaves thrive long under her? There's a quart d'ecu for
 * you: let the justices make you and fortune friends; I am for
 * other business.

PAROLLES.
 * I beseech your honour to hear me one single word.

LAFEU.
 * You beg a single penny more: come, you shall ha't: save your
 * word.

PAROLLES.
 * My name, my good lord, is Parolles.

LAFEU.
 * You beg more than word then.—Cox' my passion! give me your
 * hand:—how does your drum?

PAROLLES.
 * O my good lord, you were the first that found me.

LAFEU.
 * Was I, in sooth? and I was the first that lost thee.

PAROLLES.
 * It lies in you, my lord, to bring me in some grace, for
 * you did bring me out.

LAFEU.
 * Out upon thee, knave! dost thou put upon me at once both the
 * office of God and the devil? one brings the in grace, and the
 * other brings thee out.

[Trumpets sound.]


 * The king's coming; I know by his trumpets.—Sirrah, inquire
 * further after me; I had talk of you last night: though you are a
 * fool and a knave, you shall eat: go to; follow.

PAROLLES.
 * I praise God for you.

[Exeunt.]

SCENE 3. The same. A room in the COUNTESS'S palace.
[Flourish. Enter KING, COUNTESS, LAFEU, Lords, Gentlemen, Guards, &c.]

KING.
 * We lost a jewel of her; and our esteem
 * Was made much poorer by it: but your son,
 * As mad in folly, lack'd the sense to know
 * Her estimation home.

COUNTESS.
 * 'Tis past, my liege:
 * And I beseech your majesty to make it
 * Natural rebellion, done i' the blaze of youth,
 * When oil and fire, too strong for reason's force,
 * O'erbears it and burns on.

KING.
 * My honour'd lady,
 * I have forgiven and forgotten all;
 * Though my revenges were high bent upon him,
 * And watch'd the time to shoot.

LAFEU.
 * This I must say,—
 * But first, I beg my pardon,—the young lord
 * Did to his majesty, his mother, and his lady,
 * Offence of mighty note; but to himself
 * The greatest wrong of all: he lost a wife
 * Whose beauty did astonish the survey
 * Of richest eyes; whose words all ears took captive;
 * Whose dear perfection hearts that scorn'd to serve
 * Humbly call'd mistress.

KING.
 * Praising what is lost
 * Makes the remembrance dear.—Well, call him hither;—
 * We are reconcil'd, and the first view shall kill
 * All repetition:—let him not ask our pardon;
 * The nature of his great offence is dead,
 * And deeper than oblivion do we bury
 * Th' incensing relics of it; let him approach,
 * A stranger, no offender; and inform him,
 * So 'tis our will he should.

GENTLEMAN.
 * I shall, my liege.

[Exit Gentleman.]

KING.
 * What says he to your daughter? have you spoke?

LAFEU.
 * All that he is hath reference to your highness.

KING.
 * Then shall we have a match. I have letters sent me
 * That sets him high in fame.

[Enter BERTRAM.]

LAFEU.
 * He looks well on 't.

KING.
 * I am not a day of season,
 * For thou mayst see a sunshine and a hail
 * In me at once: but to the brightest beams
 * Distracted clouds give way; so stand thou forth;
 * The time is fair again.

BERTRAM.
 * My high-repented blames,
 * Dear sovereign, pardon to me.

KING.
 * All is whole;
 * Not one word more of the consumed time.
 * Let's take the instant by the forward top;
 * For we are old, and on our quick'st decrees
 * The inaudible and noiseless foot of time
 * Steals ere we can effect them. You remember
 * The daughter of this lord?

BERTRAM.
 * Admiringly, my liege: at first
 * I stuck my choice upon her, ere my heart
 * Durst make too bold herald of my tongue:
 * Where the impression of mine eye infixing,
 * Contempt his scornful perspective did lend me,
 * Which warp'd the line of every other favour;
 * Scorned a fair colour, or express'd it stolen;
 * Extended or contracted all proportions
 * To a most hideous object: thence it came
 * That she whom all men prais'd, and whom myself,
 * Since I have lost, have lov'd, was in mine eye
 * The dust that did offend it.

KING.
 * Well excus'd:
 * That thou didst love her, strikes some scores away
 * From the great compt: but love that comes too late,
 * Like a remorseful pardon slowly carried,
 * To the great sender turns a sour offence,
 * Crying, That's good that's gone. Our rash faults
 * Make trivial price of serious things we have,
 * Not knowing them until we know their grave:
 * Oft our displeasures, to ourselves unjust,
 * Destroy our friends, and after weep their dust:
 * Our own love waking cries to see what's done,
 * While shameful hate sleeps out the afternoon.
 * Be this sweet Helen's knell, and now forget her.
 * Send forth your amorous token for fair Maudlin:
 * The main consents are had; and here we'll stay
 * To see our widower's second marriage-day.

COUNTESS.
 * Which better than the first, O dear heaven, bless!
 * Or, ere they meet, in me, O nature, cesse!

LAFEU.
 * Come on, my son, in whom my house's name
 * Must be digested, give a favour from you,
 * To sparkle in the spirits of my daughter,
 * That she may quickly come.—

[BERTRAM gives a ring to Lafeu.]


 * By my old beard,
 * And every hair that's on 't, Helen, that's dead,
 * Was a sweet creature: such a ring as this,
 * The last that e'er I took her leave at court,
 * I saw upon her finger.

BERTRAM.
 * Hers it was not.

KING.
 * Now, pray you, let me see it; for mine eye,
 * While I was speaking, oft was fasten'd to it.—
 * This ring was mine; and when I gave it Helen
 * I bade her, if her fortunes ever stood
 * Necessitied to help, that by this token
 * I would relieve her. Had you that craft to 'reave her
 * Of what should stead her most?

BERTRAM.
 * My gracious sovereign,
 * Howe'er it pleases you to take it so,
 * The ring was never hers.

COUNTESS.
 * Son, on my life,
 * I have seen her wear it; and she reckon'd it
 * At her life's rate.

LAFEU.
 * I am sure I saw her wear it.

BERTRAM.
 * You are deceiv'd, my lord; she never saw it:
 * In Florence was it from a casement thrown me,
 * Wrapp'd in a paper, which contain'd the name
 * Of her that threw it: noble she was, and thought
 * I stood engag'd: but when I had subscrib'd
 * To mine own fortune, and inform'd her fully
 * I could not answer in that course of honour
 * As she had made the overture, she ceas'd,
 * In heavy satisfaction, and would never
 * Receive the ring again.

KING.
 * Plutus himself,
 * That knows the tinct and multiplying medicine,
 * Hath not in nature's mystery more science
 * Than I have in this ring: 'twas mine, 'twas Helen's,
 * Whoever gave it you. Then, if you know
 * That you are well acquainted with yourself,
 * Confess 'twas hers, and by what rough enforcement
 * You got it from her: she call'd the saints to surety
 * That she would never put it from her finger
 * Unless she gave it to yourself in bed,—
 * Where you have never come,—or sent it us
 * Upon her great disaster.

BERTRAM.
 * She never saw it.

KING.
 * Thou speak'st it falsely, as I love mine honour;
 * And mak'st conjectural fears to come into me
 * Which I would fain shut out. If it should prove
 * That thou art so inhuman,—'twill not prove so:—
 * And yet I know not:—thou didst hate her deadly.
 * And she is dead; which nothing, but to close
 * Her eyes myself, could win me to believe
 * More than to see this ring.—Take him away.

[Guards seize BERTRAM.]


 * My fore-past proofs, howe'er the matter fall,
 * Shall tax my fears of little vanity,
 * Having vainly fear'd too little.—Away with him;—
 * We'll sift this matter further.

BERTRAM.
 * If you shall prove
 * This ring was ever hers, you shall as easy
 * Prove that I husbanded her bed in Florence,
 * Where she yet never was.

[Exit, guarded.]

KING.
 * I am wrapp'd in dismal thinkings.

[Enter a Gentleman.]

GENTLEMAN.
 * Gracious sovereign,
 * Whether I have been to blame or no, I know not:
 * Here's a petition from a Florentine,
 * Who hath, for four or five removes, come short
 * To tender it herself. I undertook it,
 * Vanquish'd thereto by the fair grace and speech
 * Of the poor suppliant, who by this, I know,
 * Is here attending: her business looks in her
 * With an importing visage; and she told me
 * In a sweet verbal brief, it did concern
 * Your highness with herself.

KING.
 * [Reads.] 'Upon his many protestations to marry me, when his wife
 * was dead, I blush to say it, he won me. Now is the count
 * Rousillon a widower; his vows are forfeited to me, and my
 * honour's paid to him. He stole from Florence, taking no leave,
 * and I follow him to his country for justice: grant it me, O king;
 * in you it best lies; otherwise a seducer flourishes, and a poor
 * maid is undone.
 * DIANA CAPULET.'

LAFEU.
 * I will buy me a son-in-law in a fair, and toll this: I'll none of
 * him.

KING.
 * The heavens have thought well on thee, Lafeu,
 * To bring forth this discovery.—Seek these suitors:—
 * Go speedily, and bring again the count.

[Exeunt Gentleman, and some Attendants.]


 * I am afeard the life of Helen, lady,
 * Was foully snatch'd.

COUNTESS.
 * Now, justice on the doers!

[Enter BERTRAM, guarded.]

KING.
 * I wonder, sir, since wives are monsters to you.
 * And that you fly them as you swear them lordship,
 * Yet you desire to marry.—What woman's that?

[Re-enter Widow and DIANA.]

DIANA.
 * I am, my lord, a wretched Florentine,
 * Derived from the ancient Capulet;
 * My suit, as I do understand, you know,
 * And therefore know how far I may be pitied.

WIDOW.
 * I am her mother, sir, whose age and honour
 * Both suffer under this complaint we bring,
 * And both shall cease, without your remedy.

KING.
 * Come hither, count; do you know these women?

BERTRAM.
 * My lord, I neither can nor will deny
 * But that I know them: do they charge me further?

DIANA.
 * Why do you look so strange upon your wife?

BERTRAM.
 * She's none of mine, my lord.

DIANA.
 * If you shall marry,
 * You give away this hand, and that is mine;
 * You give away heaven's vows, and those are mine;
 * You give away myself, which is known mine;
 * For I by vow am so embodied yours
 * That she which marries you must marry me,
 * Either both or none.

LAFEU.
 * [To BERTRAM] Your reputation comes too short for
 * my daughter; you are no husband for her.

BERTRAM.
 * My lord, this is a fond and desperate creature
 * Whom sometime I have laugh'd with: let your highness
 * Lay a more noble thought upon mine honour
 * Than for to think that I would sink it here.

KING.
 * Sir, for my thoughts, you have them ill to friend
 * Till your deeds gain them: fairer prove your honour
 * Than in my thought it lies!

DIANA.
 * Good my lord,
 * Ask him upon his oath, if he does think
 * He had not my virginity.

KING.
 * What say'st thou to her?

BERTRAM.
 * She's impudent, my lord;
 * And was a common gamester to the camp.

DIANA.
 * He does me wrong, my lord; if I were so
 * He might have bought me at a common price:
 * Do not believe him. O, behold this ring,
 * Whose high respect and rich validity
 * Did lack a parallel; yet, for all that,
 * He gave it to a commoner o' the camp,
 * If I be one.

COUNTESS.
 * He blushes, and 'tis it:
 * Of six preceding ancestors, that gem,
 * Conferr'd by testament to the sequent issue,
 * Hath it been ow'd and worn. This is his wife;
 * That ring's a thousand proofs.

KING.
 * Methought you said
 * You saw one here in court could witness it.

DIANA.
 * I did, my lord, but loath am to produce
 * So bad an instrument; his name's Parolles.

LAFEU.
 * I saw the man to-day, if man he be.

KING.
 * Find him, and bring him hither.

[Exit an Attendant.]

BERTRAM.
 * What of him?
 * He's quoted for a most perfidious slave,
 * With all the spots o' the world tax'd and debauch'd:
 * Whose nature sickens but to speak a truth:
 * Am I or that or this for what he'll utter,
 * That will speak anything?

KING.
 * She hath that ring of yours.

BERTRAM.
 * I think she has: certain it is I lik'd her,
 * And boarded her i' the wanton way of youth:
 * She knew her distance, and did angle for me,
 * Madding my eagerness with her restraint,
 * As all impediments in fancy's course
 * Are motives of more fancy; and, in fine,
 * Her infinite cunning with her modern grace,
 * Subdu'd me to her rate: she got the ring;
 * And I had that which any inferior might
 * At market-price have bought.

DIANA.
 * I must be patient:
 * You that have turn'd off a first so noble wife
 * May justly diet me. I pray you yet,—
 * Since you lack virtue, I will lose a husband,—
 * Send for your ring, I will return it home,
 * And give me mine again.

BERTRAM.
 * I have it not.

KING.
 * What ring was yours, I pray you?

DIANA.
 * Sir, much like
 * The same upon your finger.

KING.
 * Know you this ring? this ring was his of late.

DIANA.
 * And this was it I gave him, being a-bed.

KING.
 * The story, then, goes false you threw it him
 * Out of a casement.

DIANA.
 * I have spoke the truth.

BERTRAM.
 * My lord, I do confess the ring was hers.

KING.
 * You boggle shrewdly; every feather starts you.—

[Re-enter Attendant, with PAROLLES.]


 * Is this the man you speak of?

DIANA.
 * Ay, my lord.

KING.
 * Tell me, sirrah, but tell me true I charge you,
 * Not fearing the displeasure of your master,—
 * Which, on your just proceeding, I'll keep off,—
 * By him and by this woman here what know you?

PAROLLES.
 * So please your majesty, my master hath been an honourable
 * gentleman; tricks he hath had in him, which gentlemen have.

KING.
 * Come, come, to the purpose: did he love this woman?

PAROLLES.
 * Faith, sir, he did love her; but how?

KING.
 * How, I pray you?

PAROLLES.
 * He did love her, sir, as a gentleman loves a woman.

KING.
 * How is that?

PAROLLES.
 * He loved her, sir, and loved her not.

KING.
 * As thou art a knave and no knave.—
 * What an equivocal companion is this!

PAROLLES.
 * I am a poor man, and at your majesty's command.

LAFEU.
 * He's a good drum, my lord, but a naughty orator.

DIANA.
 * Do you know he promised me marriage?

PAROLLES.
 * Faith, I know more than I'll speak.

KING.
 * But wilt thou not speak all thou know'st?

PAROLLES.
 * Yes, so please your majesty; I did go between them, as I
 * said; but more than that, he loved her,—for indeed he was mad
 * for her, and talked of Satan, and of limbo, and of furies, and I
 * know not what: yet I was in that credit with them at that time
 * that I knew of their going to bed; and of other motions, as
 * promising her marriage, and things which would derive me ill-will
 * to speak of; therefore I will not speak what I know.

KING.
 * Thou hast spoken all already, unless thou canst say they are
 * married: but thou art too fine in thy evidence; therefore stand
 * aside.—This ring, you say, was yours?

DIANA.
 * Ay, my good lord.

KING.
 * Where did you buy it? or who gave it you?

DIANA.
 * It was not given me, nor I did not buy it.

KING.
 * Who lent it you?

DIANA.
 * It was not lent me neither.

KING.
 * Where did you find it then?

DIANA.
 * I found it not.

KING.
 * If it were yours by none of all these ways,
 * How could you give it him?

DIANA.
 * I never gave it him.

LAFEU.
 * This woman's an easy glove, my lord; she goes off and on at
 * pleasure.

KING.
 * This ring was mine, I gave it his first wife.

DIANA.
 * It might be yours or hers, for aught I know.

KING.
 * Take her away, I do not like her now;
 * To prison with her: and away with him.—
 * Unless thou tell'st me where thou hadst this ring,
 * Thou diest within this hour.

DIANA.
 * I'll never tell you.

KING.
 * Take her away.

DIANA.
 * I'll put in bail, my liege.

KING.
 * I think thee now some common customer.

DIANA.
 * By Jove, if ever I knew man, 'twas you.

KING.
 * Wherefore hast thou accus'd him all this while?

DIANA.
 * Because he's guilty, and he is not guilty:
 * He knows I am no maid, and he'll swear to't:
 * I'll swear I am a maid, and he knows not.
 * Great King, I am no strumpet, by my life;
 * I am either maid, or else this old man's wife.

[Pointing to LAFEU.]

KING.
 * She does abuse our ears; to prison with her.

DIANA.
 * Good mother, fetch my bail.—Stay, royal sir;

[Exit WIDOW.]


 * The jeweller that owes the ring is sent for,
 * And he shall surety me. But for this lord
 * Who hath abus'd me as he knows himself,
 * Though yet he never harm'd me, here I quit him:
 * He knows himself my bed he hath defil'd;
 * And at that time he got his wife with child.
 * Dead though she be, she feels her young one kick;
 * So there's my riddle:—One that's dead is quick;
 * And now behold the meaning.

[Re-enter Widow with HELENA.]

KING.
 * Is there no exorcist
 * Beguiles the truer office of mine eyes?
 * Is't real that I see?

HELENA.
 * No, my good lord;
 * 'Tis but the shadow of a wife you see—
 * The name, and not the thing.

BERTRAM.
 * Both, both; O, pardon!

HELENA.
 * O, my good lord, when I was like this maid;
 * I found you wondrous kind. There is your ring,
 * And, look you, here's your letter. This it says,
 * 'When from my finger you can get this ring,
 * And are by me with child, &c.'— This is done:
 * Will you be mine now you are doubly won?

BERTRAM.
 * If she, my liege, can make me know this clearly,
 * I'll love her dearly, ever, ever dearly.

HELENA.
 * If it appear not plain, and prove untrue,
 * Deadly divorce step between me and you!—
 * O my dear mother, do I see you living?

LAFEU.
 * Mine eyes smell onions; I shall weep anon:—
 * Good Tom Drum [to PAROLLES], lend me a handkercher: so, I
 * thank thee; wait on me home, I'll make sport with thee:
 * let thy courtesies alone, they are scurvy ones.

KING.
 * Let us from point to point this story know,
 * To make the even truth in pleasure flow:—
 * If thou beest yet a fresh uncropped flower,

[To DIANA.]


 * Choose thou thy husband, and I'll pay thy dower;
 * For I can guess that, by thy honest aid,
 * Thou kept'st a wife herself, thyself a maid.
 * Of that and all the progress, more and less,
 * Resolvedly more leisure shall express:
 * All yet seems well; and if it end so meet,
 * The bitter past, more welcome is the sweet.

[Flourish.]


 * The king's a beggar, now the play is done;
 * All is well-ended if this suit be won,
 * That you express content; which we will pay
 * With strife to please you, day exceeding day:
 * Ours be your patience then, and yours our parts;
 * Your gentle hands lend us, and take our hearts.

[Exeunt.]

THE END