The Weakling

I died in sin and forthwith went to Hell; I made myself at home upon the coals Where seas of flame break on the cinder shoals. Till Satan came and said with angry yell, "You there—divulge what route by which you fell." "I spent my youth among the flowing bowls, "Wasted my life with women of dark souls, "Died brothel-fighting—drunk on muscatel."

Said he, "My friend, you’ve been directed wrong: "You’ve naught to recommend you for our feasts— "Like factory owners, brokers, elders, priests; "The air for you! This place is for the strong!" Then as I pondered, minded to rebel, He laughed and forthwith kicked me out of Hell. Robert Ervin Howard